Maybe the End

Well I just returned from a weekend in Edmonton. And all that I am going to say is that it was awesome. But it had some unfortunate side effects.

I am not sure if it is a good thing, to put myself into a setting, where I am truly happy, knowing that I can do nothing to bring it into my ultimate reality. It is like taking a vacation, into a world far beyond ones means. And ultimately it just adds to depression. I am also learning that honesty sometimes may not be the best thing.

For instance I love my blog, but in recent weeks I was shown that blogs have a darkside. I wont get into it. But if you look back, you will see some esoteric remarks, that allude to certain problems.

This weekend, I also learned from a friend that I am not alone, and that she too had her own blog (her own thoughts) used against her. That her blog and her thoughts were actually used to isolate and manipulate her. I have always thought a blog was a great way to comunicate my thought to friends that I have been distant with, and myabe this was not a good idea. I guess maybe i was a little selfish in my thoughts.

I guess I have been misguided in believing that showing a bit of ones real self, is a good thing. And thus, I think I am going to take a break from blogging for awhile. I guess it is back to the journal for me, until i can sort out once again....Friend from Foe....For it seems that from my recent conversations with people, you never really know when people are trying to manipulate you, and using my friendship, not to make my life better, but to serve some ulterior motive. So to those people I guess I will stop giving them fuel for the fire.

For my real friends out there, it may be a little more time consuming but I will do my best to find a way to keep in touch.

And with that I bid you all adieu.