Dolphins VS Sharks

I have always considered it quite self evident that Dolphins are superior to Sharks. As if one could not tell, just by looking at these two creatures, which one had the upper hand. Even a mere child would be able to tell you which one he/she would rather play with, or trust to look after the family pet.

However, the esteemed blogger and rat scallion Smidpig, would have you believe otherwise. So I feel, for the sake of all that is holy, and just in the world. That we should put this dog to bed, or should i say shark to tank.

Lets first look at sharks. Sharks are big and ugly. They have large noses, and crooked teeth. Not just one row of crooked teeth, but multiple rows of crooked teeth. And more often than not you will find scraps of not just parsley between these teeth, but entire rotting animals. And as if God was not cruel enough, he put the sharks eyes so far back on its huge head that if it opens its mouth it cannot see and often runs into things. Sharks are mean and prone to temper-tantrimes. They are also very bad actors and rely heavily on the musical talents of their "themes songs" to pull them through their performances.

Taking all this into consideration lets see if we can come up with an image of what a shark might look like if it were a human.
Just look at the picture and hum to yourself
Danadaaana... ...Danadaaaana.. .Danadaaana"
you get the picture

Now lets take a look at dolphins. Dolphins are pretty good looking. Not good looking in an arrogant way, Good looking in that dolphin next door way. They have awesome smiles, and beautiful teeth. They are friendly, easy going, and love to perform. Dolphins can be both playful and chillaxidasical (circa nmz 2006). Willing to play fetch with a beach ball or diving ring, or just swim around on their backs with a good book. So now lets take a look at what a dolphin might look like, if it were human

Now if you want to hum anything here...if you need a sound track at all ... I think
"mmmm mmmm damn thats fine"
Might be appropriate.

Like I said at the beginning of my blog. It is pretty much self evident. In fact it is so self evident that one would have to be a homosexual to prefer sharks over dolphins, and thus i must call to reference my blog dated August 16, and entitled "Unwanted Comments on Myspace".

SmidPig...you have the floor.