2 Planks and a packet of crisps please

Well it has been over a decade since this cat has gone skiing. Back in the 90's I blew out my knee at Sunshine and believed that that would be it for my skiing escapades. For a guy who grew up with skiing (I think I started at the age of 5 or so, and one of my first jobs was as a ski tech at Rabbit Hill in Edmonton circa 1984) this was not a nice thing. Luckily there was plenty of trouble to be had in the 90's so I didnt really miss it that much.

I few years ago while working in Penticton I found myself on a mountain full of snow, and was terrified of hurting myself again, So I took up snowboarding and that got me through the winter. Over the past few years I did not get a chance to get out on the board much, and thus my snowboarding skills soon deteriorated to the point of being a pain in the ass again.

So this year, the year of our lord twenty-O-seven I decided to strap the ski's back on my feet and see whether a decade was long enough to heal old wounds. The first run was a bit shaky, but by the end of the second the old form was coming back. I wont say it all came back, after all i am much much older, but I definatly felt comfortable on the hill. I tried everything from green to double black and the knee held up just fine. So it looks like I will be able to add skiing back onto the activity list, and this makes me very happy. It seems that since becoming an adult some 2 decades ago that list has progressive become shorter and shorter, with most of the activities currently on it, primarily revolving around the liver and kidneys.

So, I am going to make a promise to myself right here and right now. A trip to the mountains at the least once a month for the rest of the ski season, followed by a bi-weekly trip next season.....so with that said anyone interesting in coming to Sunshine on Sunday, you are more than welcome.

NMZ out

Jenny's Jungle Fever

Ok now dont get me wrong I am not a racist, and the fact would still remain, that if this man was any color it would still be a strange encounter, though sad, but kind of funny.

Well yesterday morning I was a bit slow out of the gate, having spent Valentines Day Night with Jeanine and Kimmy at Tequilas. But after consuming my weight in water, the day was just starting to get smooth. I had made arrangements with Little Jen to go for sushi at Midori. And after circling the downtown core of Calgary a couple of times, and getting frustrated on more than one slushy one way street, I finally did find her.

Midori is a great little restaurant. I try to get there every couple of weeks, they have great lunch deals, like the Midori Special Bento Box mmmm. Its not a big sushi place, just one of those little ones with a sushi bar, and a few booths. Stepping through the door everything looked normal, however our favorite booth by the door was taken, so the waitress took us to the only open booth in the place. Now beside this booth, there is a small table for 2....the only one like it in the restaurant. Now on this fine morning, there was a very black man, sleeping at this table. He was wearing a blue snow jacket, runners with no socks, and a pair of camo pants. I only remember this because......well let me continue.

Anyway the waitress apologized for him and said she would wake him up and ask him to leave. i thought nothing of it and took my seat. Jen on the other hand was standing there looking like she was going to be sick. No I mean really she looked like she was going to throw up. Then she started to laugh. Then she looked at me. The waitress tried to talk to the man as he woke up. He seemed disoriented, and he shifted in his seat. Jen says "I think you need to call the police" The waitress looks at her, I look at her, 'call the police' I think that maybe Jen is being a little over-zealous, but she really looks like she is going to be ill, like she wants to run away, like she does not want to be here at all, but for some reason she is frozen there. "I think you should call the police, his parts are hanging out."

"His parts are hanging out" I look at her, and then she points down to an area that only a girl would notice, and low and behold, "dare she blows", yes indeed he is hanging out. And yes it is true what they say about black men LOL.

Once the waitress notices, she too does not know what to do, but she was wise enough to seat us at the bar. Now I am not going to get into the rest of what happened to the man. Suffice it to say, he had no money, and when he finally left, all he left behind was the seed for more than one story that will no doubt be circulating around the offices of all those who were eating at the time.

Now for those of you who know Jen, well you can imagine how this event played in her mind. From what she has told me, the image of our little friend is burned into her psyche. As she ate her sushi I was tempted to order her a Kapa-maki uncut, just to see her reaction. I wonder if she will ever be able to eat burnt breakfast sausage again without reliving that moment. It turns out, that jen has never seen Jungle Fever, nor has she lived such an experience. I wonder if this event will spark her curiosity. Only time will tell, so I would ask that everyone keep on eye on her, and if you see her heading off to a basketball game, or at a stampeders practice hanging around the locker room, please, please just make sure she doesnt get hurt LOL

Anyway that is all for me, NMZ out

Happy Fucking Valentines Day ;-)

Well it is finally here. This little day we call valentines day. Love is in the air, and everyone driving down the deerfoot is blowing kisses at each other. Divorced couples are getting back together. Republicans are taking Democrats to lunch, and the kkk is working a soup kitchen in downtown New Orleans. Ah isnt love grand.

No but seriously.

Today is Valentines day and I guess I should say happy valentines day to all those beautiful women out there who bring a little bit of color to my normally drab existence, so here goes, Happy Valentines day Mom, Shauna, Kelly(bonus cuddle for you), Little T, Big T, Jenna, JoJo, Jasmine (new to the list, welcome aboard), Nicole, Yenny and Linny, Tasha, Amy Jean, Rebecca, Julie (another newcomer), Little Jen and Big Jen, Jessica, JTAG (Extra big one for you....just cuz ur one of my favorites), Julie, Leanna, Lizzy, Crystal (thanks for all the baking), Kerri(wedding bells and all), Leigh, LeeAnn, and of course all those sexy bitches at crush.....oh yes and crush re-opens today, so i think i know where i will be, being single on valentines day.

Boooyakasha

Relationships

Well Valentines Day will soon be upon us. For some this will be a day of love and all that goes with it. But for others, like myself, it will just be another day of being single. Not that i really mind so much, because all I seem to see around me are a multitude of dysfunctional relationships. And, in my own defense, I can be just as dysfunctional on my own, thank you very much.

I have friends going through divorces; friends feeling like shit because they dont get enough affection; friends who feel their boyfriends/girlfriends are cheating on them; friends who are cheating; bla bla bla. I just dont get it.

I think the real problem is that none of us know, or have any idea of what we are suppose to do in a relationship. Our grandparents knew, and they made it work. Some of our parents knew, and some of them made it work. But today, I dare say that not too many of us have a clue. I know I dont have a clue. And looking around me, that seems to be the rule rather than the exception.

I have always thought that relationships are about helping to meet our needs. It is a give-n-take sort of thing. I will help you with this need or yours, if you help me with this need of mine. A long time ago, the man needed someone to take care of his family while he went out to gather food or make money. A woman needed someone to gather food, and bring home money so that the home could be provided for. It was a symbiotic relationship. So what happens when individuals construct a world that is self sufficient. What if they decide to "do-away" with certain things rather than find a relationship that will provide for them.

I know that I dont overly think about the fact I am not in a relationship. For the most part I am too busy to think of such things. Although when I am sitting alone on a saturday night watching a movie, I cannot help but miss those bye-gone days of cuddling on the sofa and being forced to perform a foot massage (Patricia....). And I am sure that come Tuesday evening, I will be thinking about all that I am missing, by not having a valentine.

St. Augustine once said, "It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all." I am not sure about that. I would give anything to have never loved at all. It was that innocence and ignorance about the whole process that made it so intoxicating. Now, having loved many times, there is no mystery. It is just another thing you do, like eating cake, or doing the dishes. I dare say the illusion has been broken.

Happy Humpday

Damn you know you are busy when you forget to post a blog for over a week. Well I guess I shouldnt say "busy" because looking back I am finding it hard to figure out what I have been doing the past week or so, but I will try to make a few points.

I guess the safest place to start would be the SuperBowl. In what turned out to be a crazy game of turnovers, rain, turnovers, rain, errors and even a little bit of panic on my side....the Colts came out victorious. It was not the game anyone expected, and for that I am thankful, however, I can honestly remember thinking during the first quarter...."you have to be kidding me." I spent the game at home on the sofa, drinking coke zero and eating some awesome baked goods from Crystal down the hall. Mike came by for most of the game, but it was nothing like the Superbowl party I was hoping to throw, and this was a direct result of Friday night.

I sort of had an idea that friday was going to get out of control, but I had no idea to what extent. I picked up Dan and Stephanie from wawanesa at around 4, we dropped my truck off and then walked over to grab jessica, and then it was off to Melrose place. I made some ground rules for the night, which basically stated all the beer i can drink but no hard liquor. This turned into a bit of a catch 22, because I managed to stay up very very late without passing out, but the catch was, my wallet would have preferred an early night of passing out around ten.

Anyway, we all went to Melrose to watch the game, where we were joined by JC, Steve, Jennifer, Jay, Marc, Nicole, and even Nate made a surprise appearance. The flames game was good fun, and everyone got well primed with IceBergs (for the record, an ice berg is a pint o beer topped off with slushy margarietta mix....mmmmm) I think I had 10. Anyway, time to pay the tab, and yes you guessed it, our lazy waitress put us all on one tab. Now dont get me wrong here, but you would think, that if like 15 people arrive at different times over the course of the evening that they might not all be as "together" as you might think. I know we were all sitting together, but to put that many people on one tab is just stupid, and any waitress stupid enough to do it, deserves to get stiffed, just like the poor sucker who gets stuck with organizing the tab...in this case me. But fuck it, in the end everything got paid for and I was only out a few extra quid to cover the tip....luckily JC and Steve stepped up to help with the loss....Kudos to you guys.

So tab paid....off to the Rhino. Now the Rhino was packed Colin was spinning when we got there, it being his birthday we shared a few bevies and "what not" and then it was off to sit at my table with the girls and just people watch for an hour or so. If there is one things Nite Clubs are good for is people watching, plenty of drunk/High girls running around with outfits that would make any stripper jealous. And this night was no exeption.

After the Club it was back to Jessicas for a bit of late night debauchery at which time I threw out the "hard liquor rule" and purchased a bottle of vodka for the after party. I will not get into any of the details of the after party other than as a result of my general drunken-ness i slept most of saturday away, and failed to make any preparations for my superbowl party. And that is the long version as to why I had no Superbowl party.

Ok well that was my weekend, minus a few lengthy cat naps, a trip to church, and my first helping of fast food since xmas....but that my friends is another story. This blog is getting long, i will leave it at that, and will try to write tomorrow about my recent trip to edmonton.
Ciao....newman out